


War of hearts

by Hallownight89



Category: Bridgerton (TV), Bridgerton Series - Julia Quinn
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Internal Thoughts, Song Lyrics
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-25
Updated: 2021-01-25
Packaged: 2021-03-17 19:41:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,541
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28979781
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hallownight89/pseuds/Hallownight89
Summary: Based on the Song War of hearts by Ruelle.The lyrics fit Kanthony to a tea.It’s set just after the book ends (before either epilogue) and it’s that night after the accident. Just Anthony’s mind and thoughts.Bold italics are song lyrics.
Relationships: Anthony Bridgerton/Kate Sheffield
Comments: 8
Kudos: 86





	War of hearts

**_Come to me, In the night hours, I will wait for you, And I can’t sleep, Cause thoughts devour, Thoughts of you consume_ **

Anthony could not sleep. His thought of his wife would not settle.

Kate has invaded his dreams since the day they met, she had consumed him in every witty retort, every glare and oh god, she had consumed him with her yells of excitement during Pall Mall, her petrified face that night in the library, that night in their bed... he had been overtaken, overcome and devoured by everything about her. 

He lay next to her and watched sleeping form, each breath coming in and going a steady rhythm that would usually have allowed him to sleep but after today, after he had come so close to losing her, and the pain he had felt as he watched that dratted carriage topple, the feeling of dread and panic that had felt as he saw Kate lying there, prone and not moving pinned by the carriage. The pain was worse than when he had lost his father, worse that the realisation that he would not live longer than his father did. His fear that he had wasted his chance by being a stupid idiot and running away from the love he felt for his wife.

**_I can't help but love you, Even though I try not to, I can't help but want you, I know that I'd die without you_ **

It was at that moment that Anthony had been sure he would die, the ground would swallow him there and then and everything would go to Benedict. He would not, he could not live without Kate, he had proclaimed to the air that it should have been him. It was always supposed to be him. The relief the sheer relief of his wife’s voice had nearly made him sob, in public, like a man possessed. He proclaimed his love before he had even got her out. He could not help it. He had tried so very hard not to fall in love but he knew, it was a fruitless and ridiculous idea. He had fallen for her during that Pall Mall game, every moment since, each touch, each stolen glance had set a fire in his entire being. He needed this woman more than he needed air. He confessed his secret, his fears to the one person in his life who knew him best. Who would understand and not think he was completely ridiculous, he knew Kate, she loved him and had overcome her own fears with him so surely he could do the same with her. As she lay there, broken leg aloft on pillows, she had listened, comforted and vowed they would get through this together. She felt sure he would live a long life and for the first time since his father died. Anthony felt optimistic about his future.

**_Stay with me a little longer, I will wait for you, Shadows creep, And want grows stronger, Deeper than the truth_ **

Kate had fallen asleep after Anthony whispered sweet nothings, and naughty nothings to her. Told her of all the things he wanted to do to her. 2 months. He could do this surely. 2 months of no rigorous activity. He let his eyes roam over his wife’s form as she slept, her breasts rising and falling gently, the little twitch of her mouth, her peaceful serene face. It was his utter privilege to be the one who saw her thus. The only one other than save their future children, who would see her like this. She was a sight to behold. This strong, obstinate woman who had grown on him, this beautiful woman who had helped him be the man who would make his father proud. He knew that he would fall in love with her each and every day as he learnt something new about his wife. The need for his wife would never go away, he finally understood why his parents had such a big brood, he understood why Daphne and Simon hadn’t taken long to start their own family and as much as Anthony would love to start… he would have to wait. 2 months. Surely I can do that he thought to himself, I have more self control that that.

**_I can't help but love you, Even though I try not to I can't help but want you I know that I'd die without you._ **

Kate gave a little moan in her sleep, the type of moan that shot straight through Anthony’s body causing him to tingle. Blast it. 2 months was a long time… 

**_I can’t help but be wrong in the dark, Cause I’m overcome in this war of hearts, I can’t help but want oceans to part, Cause I’m overcome in this war of hearts_ **

Sat there in the dark room, Anthony tried to get his mind from all the things he wants to do his wife, pleased he was wrong about her, about love and everything he had done before. He knew they had a lifetime and would live each day as if he was immortal, as if it was his last, he would have no regrets when the time came. The woman beside him would be there and he knew that he would protect her with everything he had and love her with even more. He could not wait for the two months to end so he could show his wife everything. So, he could show his wife just how much he loved her, how much better would be knowing that each movement was filled with love, acknowledging their love for one another in the most primitive of ways. He was a fool to think he not fall in love with Kate. His entire family saw it before he did. No one could rattle him like his wife, no one could argue with him like his wife, even before they knew each other. She had consumed his thoughts to the point he was overcome. He could feel his heart beating, moving in time with each breath she took and he was content and at peace.

**_I can't help but love you, Even though I try not to, I can't help but want you, I know that I'd die without you_ **

Anthony lay down, carefully not to knock his wife as he moved closer to her, breathing in that intoxicating scent that had flown through his veins since that first dance, since that first kiss. Smiling to himself, a bee might have changed his life 10 years ago by striking down his father but it also changed his life again, for the better not 3 months before, it was a stroke of luck being caught by his mother, Mary and Lady Featherington. He might have been too late realising that he was going to marry the wrong Miss Sheffield. This was what Anthony needed. He needed Kate’s fire, wit and stubbornness. He had to admit to himself that he was wrong, he might have thought he had been courting Edwina but really, it was Kate. It was her he had thought of when buying the flowers, the pink roses he had thought would bring out her eyes more than Edwina’s. He wanted her good opinion, he craved it until he craved her.

Lady Featherington’s insistence they marry might have been a damned nuisance at that time but now, he rather thought he might own the damnable woman a token of gratitude and probably his mother as well. She knew him better than he thought after she suggested the walk in the flower garden where he stumbled upon Kate that day. The incessant teasing Daphne and Colin had given him after his betrothal was announced, the smug look on Simon’s face. Simon knew him as well as his family, knew he had met his match in Kate. Colin just trilled and teased. It was Colin ultimately, he owed his thanks to, Colin made him meet Kate, Colin made him see it was simple. All he had to do was love her and tell her that. Anthony shivered at the thought of what might have happened if he had. No, he cannot let his thoughts venture that way, it was bad enough. He hoped all of his siblings would be as lucky as him in love and life.

Sighing contently, he pulled his wife closer and she stirred “Anthony…” she whispered. “go back to sleep my love” he whispered peppering a light kiss upon her cheek as he settled down “Love you” she mumbled as she fell back asleep. Anthony smiled and kissed her one more “I love you too” and he closed his eyes. Content and loved, despite all the effort to fight it, he knew now, he was where he was meant to be, and this was where he would always be. Next to the woman he loved. He would get through 2 months of restraint for a lifetime of happiness and love. Or he would have to get creative instead of being restrained, with a smile on his face and his heart full, Anthony fell into sleep happy that this war with his heart was now over.

**Author's Note:**

> I own nothing.
> 
> Credits for the song go to Ruelle.
> 
> Book is of course the Queen that is JQ.
> 
> It’s my first Anthony Kate. Likely not my last.
> 
> Hope you enjoyed ❤️


End file.
